Here's what happened when I gave it a go. Kind, genuine, smart, great smile
Count them up: that's only four. FOUR. Average that out, and it took me five seconds to come up with each one. Five seconds apiece, and I've known myself more than 30 years. Why on earth wouldn't the adjectives roll off my tongue with fluidity and grace and assurance?
Then it occurred to me: I should see if what I dislike about myself would turn out any different. Again, I hit the stopwatch, and out came: procrastinator, needs more patience, speak up, be braver, not goal-oriented, too passive. Six. Which adds up to two more dislikes than likes. (Not to mention that on the tip of my tongue was number seven, "daydreams too much.")
Isn't that kind of sad? And, more importantly, isn't something wrong with this picture? Too see if anything would change, I did the same thing again but about my husband. My results? The opposite. Plenty of likes rolled out, and I stammered through the things I wish he'd improve. The fact that I could see him clearly but not me makes me wonder if we're trained to look for the best in others but the worst in ourselves, like we're the old kitchen or bathroom of the house, a DIY project that needs remodeling. Is this behavior what all those New Year's resolutions have taught us?
I can't help but think it's time to switch things around. Perhaps, as the holidays and 2015 fast approach, we need to forget about how we think we need to change. Perhaps, instead, we should think about what we love often enough that, in twenty seconds – or even ten – our beautiful qualities spill out with ease and confidence and in great numbers. I wonder...I wonder if we'd be happier. If we'd love more overall.
|And that includes you. :)|